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219 points surprisetalk | 1 comments | | HN request time: 0s | source
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dang ◴[] No.45379783[source]
I believe that these self-reported surveys are partly testing the cultural acceptability of complaining—that is, the more unacceptable it is to complain, the happier one comes out in the scoring. How well that corresponds to 'actual' happiness is, of course, a different question.

I base this on experience with some of the 'happy' cultures on the list. However, I would be interested in knowing whether HN members from Finland, Denmark, Iceland, Sweden, and the Netherlands (to name the top 5) agree with this concept or not.

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carlosjobim ◴[] No.45380127[source]
It is obvious to anybody who has ever been to the Nordic countries: They are far from being the happiest people in the world. A lot of them are very miserable, for reasons that I could never deduce.
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vidarh ◴[] No.45380281[source]
Is it? As someone from Norway, who has spent plenty of time in the other Nordic countries, I'd disagree strongly. We'll complain a lot. Until you ask us to actually rank how happy we are with our lives.

If you base you impression on what people are saying without explicitly asking how happy they are with their lives, then you're getting an impression that's biased by almost an eagerness to complain, despite at the end of the day generally being very satisfied.

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carlosjobim ◴[] No.45380353[source]
You're disagreeing with yourself. Somebody who complains a lot and in other ways shows how miserable they are does not become happy by saying they are happy. You can maybe lie to yourself that you are happy, but you can't fool others. Although Norwegians and Danes are generally happier than Finns and Swedes.
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vidarh ◴[] No.45380789[source]
No, I am not. Complaining does not require unhappiness at all. That there are lots of things I'd like to be better does not mean I'm not happy. That I enjoy complaining does not make me unhappy either - on the contrary, it makes me happier.

> You can maybe lie to yourself that you are happy

This is inherently paradoxical and hence nonsensical. If you successfully convince yourself that you are happy, you are happy.

> Although Norwegians and Danes are generally happier than Finns and Swedes.

That you think you know better than people themselves whether they are happy is just rude and insulting.

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carlosjobim ◴[] No.45381040[source]
You are the person focusing on complaining specifically. I stated that the Nordics are far from being the happiest people in the world, and that is not by counting how much people complain.

> This is inherently paradoxical and hence nonsensical. If you successfully convince yourself that you are happy, you are happy.

If people are visibly unhappy but tell you that they are very happy, that doesn't mean that they've become happy by convincing themselves. That's like a guy screaming and punching you while he's saying that he's very calm. It's not reality, it's delusion.

When somebody successfully convinces themselves to be happy, they don't continue their lives showing all the behaviour and attitudes of an unhappy person. You can also outwardly tell that they are happy.

> That you think you know better than people themselves whether they are happy is just rude and insulting.

Oh, the insolence!

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vidarh ◴[] No.45383939[source]
> You are the person focusing on complaining specifically. I stated that the Nordics are far from being the happiest people in the world, and that is not by counting how much people complain.

Explain to us in what way you have determined that you know better than people themselves how happy they are, then, please.

> When somebody successfully convinces themselves to be happy, they don't continue their lives showing all the behaviour and attitudes of an unhappy person. You can also outwardly tell that they are happy.

Given what you've written I have no reason to believe that you are capable of telling whether people are happy or not at all, as I simply don't believe you will pick out genuine markers of unhappiness from culturally or personality dependent traits that are not.

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1. carlosjobim ◴[] No.45386092[source]
What do you benefit from resorting to personal attacks? That only limits your own reasoning.

Most times it is not very difficult to tell if a person is unhappy when you interact with them. Especially when they don't try to hide it. When your dog or cat is unhappy, you know it pretty easily. People are usually not much different.