Take something you don’t like and try to like it

As a compulsive, I have the problem of liking too many things. I don’t drink coffee because in a month I’ll be neck deep in forums about the proper way to grind beans. I don’t own an aquarium because I’ll be obsessively learning about perfect water pH for the most exotic fish. I don’t drink hot tea because I’ll be studying growth patterns and how seasonality affects leaves and their flavor. I don’t drink beer because I’d be sucked into learning how to craft my own.

I appreciate that it’s useful to have an open mind about your tastes and preferences, but each rabbit hole I stumble into is far deeper than the time I have available to explore. So for me, i have to find reasons to dislike things to protect my time and my existing obsessions.

As someone with ADHD, for me obsessing over something to the point of needing to be reminded to eat and drink is actually extremely healthy.

It took me a long time to accept that following my special interests is what my brain craves and what gives me a sense of fulfillment. It might be unhealthy for a neurotypical person but very healthy for me.

In fact when I am losing the spark and just can't get into anything that is when I know I am burning out and need to make changes.

Strange question: Could you obsess mainly over time management / optimisation and fix all of this?

Kind off.

First of all, time management techniques for neurotypical people do NOT work for people with ADHD.

This is why an diagnosis is so important. If you don't know that you have ADHD you will constantly try stuff that won't work for you, you will set up yourself for failure and do more harm that good and it will destroy your self esteem.

Neurotypical people tend to be importance motivated while ADHD people are interest motivated. So the approach needs to be very different. Furthermore time is very different for ADHD people. Most neurotypical people can not cram in the work of 8 hours in 2 hours, I can. But I also can't hyper focus all the time and have times where I am not getting anything done.

With ADHD it is more about managing your level of stimulation. You start the day in a dopamine deficit and need to start with small tasks that gives you quick wins. You can't tackle the important but absolutely boring work head on, you need to do some stimulating activities first to get the ball rolling.

Many ADHD people including myself develop a special interest in ADHD and organizational techniques to manage it so yeah it happens. But you can't fully control what you happen to be interested in.

Though the whole self optimizing thing is also dangerous. Some people can learn to mask their ADHD very well and be super organized but it comes at a cost. It takes tremendous energy and leads to ADHD burnout in the long term. That is often the trigger for adults to get diagnosed in the first place because they just can't keep up the masking anymore.

> You start the day in a dopamine deficit and need to start with small tasks that gives you quick wins. You can't tackle the important but absolutely boring work head on, you need to do some stimulating activities first to get the ball rolling.

Sounds like just about every human being.

The difference is that neurotypical people often have a super power that is called not having a executive dysfunction. If they want to do the task, think the task is important and are able to do the task, they can just do the task.

It is hard for me to even imagine that such a thing can exist but it absolutely is the case.

The difference is how strict the "need" it. Like neurotypical people also benefit from working on something they are interested at but for ADHD people it is not optional but necessary to function.

Also neurotypical people get much more dopamine out of even simple tasks while I can have the best conversation ever with someone and still need some fidget toys to not go crazy from sitting around.

Are you on an AD(H)D medications?