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118 points blondie9x | 1 comments | | HN request time: 0.241s | source
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jandrewrogers ◴[] No.43673380[source]
Anecdotally, among the people I know in Seattle, many people who have happily been in the same relationship for decades are not married. People are not avoiding long-term relationships, they are avoiding the baggage and fairly rigid assumptions that comes with state intervention in their relationships. There is zero social pressure to be “officially” married so people have no reason to do it for the sake of social conformity. Both men and women are subscribing to this.

I think some of this is a side-effect of many people planning to never have children.

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willidiots ◴[] No.43673584[source]
One thing to be mindful of is that this limits your ability to help your partner as you age. State intervention can play both ways.
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jb1991 ◴[] No.43673605[source]
That’s unfortunate. And it’s a uniquely American mindset. Long-term relationships in Europe for example do not require marriage in the same way that Americans do. People get married in the states because of the law, people get married in other countries because they just want to get married for emotional or spiritual reasons.
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pdabbadabba ◴[] No.43673770[source]
> People get married in the states because of the law

That's at least vastly overstated, and probably just false. I'm an American living in a major urban center and I don't think I know anybody for whom the decision to get married was influenced by legal considerations to any significant degree.

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1. kgermino ◴[] No.43673837[source]
I do know a fair number of people who got married for health insurance (not really legal reasons, but maybe adjacent?).

Though very few of those cases we’re people who otherwise would not have gotten married, rather people who got a legal marriage very quickly to access health, benefits then took the normal amount of time for the ceremonial wedding