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Half the men in Seattle are never-married singles, census data shows

(www.seattletimes.com)
118 points blondie9x | 7 comments | 13 Apr 25 14:36 UTC | HN request time: 0s | source | bottom
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jandrewrogers ◴[13 Apr 25 15:15 UTC] No.43673380[source]▶
Anecdotally, among the people I know in Seattle, many people who have happily been in the same relationship for decades are not married. People are not avoiding long-term relationships, they are avoiding the baggage and fairly rigid assumptions that comes with state intervention in their relationships. There is zero social pressure to be “officially” married so people have no reason to do it for the sake of social conformity. Both men and women are subscribing to this.

I think some of this is a side-effect of many people planning to never have children.

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willidiots ◴[13 Apr 25 15:41 UTC] No.43673584[source]▶
One thing to be mindful of is that this limits your ability to help your partner as you age. State intervention can play both ways.
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jb1991 ◴[13 Apr 25 15:43 UTC] No.43673605[source]▶
That’s unfortunate. And it’s a uniquely American mindset. Long-term relationships in Europe for example do not require marriage in the same way that Americans do. People get married in the states because of the law, people get married in other countries because they just want to get married for emotional or spiritual reasons.
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1. pdabbadabba ◴[13 Apr 25 16:03 UTC] No.43673770[source]▶
> People get married in the states because of the law

That's at least vastly overstated, and probably just false. I'm an American living in a major urban center and I don't think I know anybody for whom the decision to get married was influenced by legal considerations to any significant degree.

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2. kgermino ◴[13 Apr 25 16:11 UTC] No.43673837[source]▶
I do know a fair number of people who got married for health insurance (not really legal reasons, but maybe adjacent?).

Though very few of those cases we’re people who otherwise would not have gotten married, rather people who got a legal marriage very quickly to access health, benefits then took the normal amount of time for the ceremonial wedding

3. jb1991 ◴[13 Apr 25 17:50 UTC] No.43674531[source]▶
Tax benefits. Married, filing jointly. Happens a lot, including to people within my family.

Also, health insurance. Another thing Americans have yet to learn from Europe. In the states, sometimes you have to get married just to get health insurance. It’s kind of ridiculous.

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4. jb1991 ◴[13 Apr 25 17:55 UTC] No.43674559[source]▶
Just google all of the legal and financial benefits that you get in the United States when you get married.
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5. pdabbadabba ◴[14 Apr 25 00:06 UTC] No.43676856[source]▶
I'm not ignorant of the legal incentives in the U.S. and I'm not saying people never marry for those reasons. But the post I was responding to was making a much stronger generalization. Most people who marry in the U.S. also do it for "emotional or spiritual reasons."
6. nothercastle ◴[14 Apr 25 03:44 UTC] No.43677865[source]▶
There are benefits if you have different income levels but penalties in the low and the high end. Very high penalties on the low end
7. devilbunny ◴[14 Apr 25 03:56 UTC] No.43677928[source]▶
The legal incentives are quite large, but the financial ones are much less impressive unless you have a stay-at-home spouse.