The Rise of Malört, an Unexpected Midwest princess

My friends make a cocktail with Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout. They also have a multi-year running gag where they offer me a bottle of fine whiskey or bourbon at a campfire but it has in fact been replaced by Malort. Then, when I am choking and gagging someone else offers me some water to wash away the taste, which is in fact also Malort.

That's so funny. Water doesn't even wash away the taste anyway

> My friends make a cocktail with Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout.

Fuck me I almost gagged reading that. The rest is just a horror story. That would be the camping trip I return from alone and immediately call a criminal defense lawyer.

There remain jurisdictions in the United States where it is legal to shoot someone for replacing water with Malort.

> Malort, White Monster, and C4 preworkout

What do they call this cocktail? I suggest "Malörtal Kombat".

The Grand Malort Seizure?

Lighten up and live a little. You have to be open to essentially harmless pranks like this or what kind of sterilized life are you living.