Previous threads we've done: https://news.ycombinator.com/submitted?id=proberts.
You should have considered the immigration consequences before you got married. The only thing that can change your situation is if your marriage ends in death or divorce. Otherwise you must wait.
9 FAM 502.2-3(D)
> a. (U) Immediate Relative Converts to Third Preference: If the child of a U.S. citizen is the beneficiary of an IR petition, the petition automatically converts to a third preference petition if the child marries. The priority date of the third preference petition is the filing date of the immediate relative petition.
> b. (U) First Preference Converts to Third Preference: If the unmarried son or daughter of a U.S. citizen marries before the visa is issued, the beneficiary's first preference petition automatically converts to a family third preference petition. Any child(ren) of the beneficiary would then be entitled to derivative third preference status. The priority date remains the same.
> e. (U) Third Preference Converts to First Preference: (1) (U) A third preference petition approved for a married son or daughter of a U.S. citizen who has since become widowed or divorced automatically converts to accord first preference status (or IR status if the beneficiary is under the age of 21). If the petition converts to first preference, the accompanying or following-to-join child(ren) may be granted derivative first preference status. The priority date remains the same.
I may be wrong, but I think immigration consequences were not something any reasonable, normal person would have had any reason to think of. We are normal people, living normal lives. As I say, I may be wrong, but this feels like blaming the victim.
OP evidently made an incorrect assumption somewhere: perhaps they thought that they would stay in IR2/F1. Or perhaps they assumed that even if they change to F3, it would be as good as IR2/F1.