I wasted years of my life in crypto

I get that the crypto world right now is a casino, but the unfulfilled need is still there:

I want to be able to buy over the internet as anonymously as when I use cash in the real world.

The monkey's paw curls. Wish granted... but in the form of Palantir, Flock, etc. tracking your every move so those cash transactions can be just as anonymous as a credit card transaction.