←back to thread

631 points eatitraw | 1 comments | | HN request time: 0.207s | source
Show context
donatj ◴[] No.45957949[source]
> The other day, someone told me, “I can’t imagine you ever being awkward with people.”

I was telling my therapist of several years recently about being uncomfortable with the number of new people I've had to meet recently.

He seemed surprised that I wasn't excited by it all and said something along the lines of "You seem like a very social person, that seems out of character." It struck me… am I really that good at masking that my therapist didn't realize I am absolutely terrified in near all social situations? I have zero idea how to make small talk with people I haven't known for years.

Working from home since COVID has made my social skills so much worse because I don't get the practice.

replies(12): >>45958672 #>>45958712 #>>45958812 #>>45958957 #>>45959042 #>>45959146 #>>45959363 #>>45960759 #>>45962082 #>>45962348 #>>45963370 #>>45965244 #
1. em-bee ◴[] No.45958712[source]
i think part of the reason is that our own discomfort feels much stronger than it actually shows to others. the discomfort is inside us, and the people we interact with don't notice because for them it is not a concept. only if you and i meet one or both of us might realize the others discomfort.

it's kind of like farting in public. you know you did, and you think everyone noticed, but in reality most didn't