Maybe you’re not trying

> But the feeling of effort doesn’t mean that you’re Actually Trying.

That's why I go out of my way to dunk on people who treat “try things” and “hard work” as useful advice. What you work hard on matters. If they wanted respect, they ought to have had the honesty to admit they do not have specific advice for you (or lack the time to help).

But “try things” and “hard work” are excellent advice. Someone who’s working really hard to solve a problem one way when it’s not working is not in fact “trying things”. Someone who’s trying many things but putting no effort into it is not “working hard”.

People willing to both try things and work hard are much more likely to discover a good solution.

Yes, they're both necessary, but they're not useful to someone who is stuck. They're both vague blow-off statements. If someone isn't working hard, suggest they spend more time on the issue; if they're stuck suggesting somewhere in the process to try something else.