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Are we the baddies?

(geohot.github.io)
692 points AndrewSwift | 1 comments | | HN request time: 0.206s | source
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protocolture ◴[] No.44478596[source]
>But eventually the market will fix this, right? People will feel sick of being manipulated and move elsewhere?

You can literally go outside and talk to people. There's no moat around dating apps. Human beings continue to exist in meatspace. I am yet to see a dating app contract that prevents you from being casually approached by strangers. Heck matchmakers still exist.

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seydor ◴[] No.44478658[source]
> You can literally go outside and talk to people.

You can't . If you talk to modern city people the way you casually said 'hi' to strangers in the 90s , at best you 'll end up in a tiktok branded as a creepy person

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Klonoar ◴[] No.44478865[source]
No? Just... don't be creepy.

I've done this a few times over the last few days alone (in Seattle no less, a city infamous for being antisocial - though I'm willing to accept some were tourists for the 4th).

IME, people are actually starved for human interaction.

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bragh ◴[] No.44478916[source]
It makes no sense to have a high risk of getting blasted all over local Facebook groups/Instagram/Tiktok for daring to approach while being ugly when they can use dating apps for zero risk. And if dating apps feel expensive to use, then there is Photofeeler also to validate your attractiveness.
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Klonoar ◴[] No.44479045[source]
You are seriously overthinking this shit.
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bragh ◴[] No.44479231[source]
Carefully considering actions that might have life-ruining consequences is not overthinking.
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zbentley ◴[] No.44479998[source]
I recommend being very honest with yourself here, whether or not you want to share it in a reply.

Is the low chance of bad consequences the only factor keeping you from talking to strangers? There’s a low chance of bad consequences when you cross a busy street, too.

Is fear of rejection by an individual or group a factor, too? There’s a much higher chance of that happening, but it’s far from life ruining.

Are you worried that you have social behaviors that make it more likely you are considered creepy in social interactions? If so, are there ways you can reduce those behaviors?

Are there other areas where acute awareness of severe potential negative consequences makes you avoid activities that lots of other people in your cohort might enjoy?

Source: it me. If you’re in a similar situation, know that it can get a lot better. Just takes time and work, like everything.

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bragh ◴[] No.44480331[source]
The risks and consequences of crossing a busy street are nowhere near as unknown or potentially severe. Wait until all the traffic has stopped, look to your left and your right and behind your back (typical situational awareness during bounding overwatch), cross the road. Even if something very rare and extreme happens, nobody sane will blast you on social media for failing to dodge a meteor or a suddenly exploding car.

When it comes to social context, you might miss some kind of sign and the worst cases there are pretty terrifying, might even get arrested in UK, which will lead to losing a job, failing any background checks, might even become homeless — and nobody sane will have any empathy for your mistake.

So I really do not get why people are against dating apps, when those are the best thing ever to avoid catastrophic consequences for initial approach.

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1. protocolture ◴[] No.44485233[source]
I know cops are pretty crazy in the UK, but I cant imagine a scenario where you get arrested for saying hello to someone.

The worst case scenario for crossing a road is that you die. Thats worse than some girls laughing at you on social media.