A 37-year-old wanting to learn computer science

As you know, getting an entry-level job at your age will be very hard. Your best bet is to look at what employers are seeking by examining current job openings and using them as a guide for what to study. Try to identify the fundamentals you need to learn. I would even recommend applying to see if you get any responses; even securing an interview would be a plus. This will help you get prepared for your real job search once you are ready.

Find a job at a company, any job you qualify for, that has an IT department where you want to work. Make friends in the IT department and see if you can get the manager there to offer you an entry-level position once you learn what you need to know to do the job. Being a good employee in one department can take you a long way if you want to transfer to another.

Additionally, give yourself a deadline. Do not leave it open-ended; it's too easy to meander and get nowhere. It's also unfair to your wife to carry the load indefinitely. Plan out your journey before you quit your current job and stick to it.

FYI, programing as a job is no where nearly the same as programming as a hobby. The job is full of pressure to get things done and you write code you may have little interest in.

Good luck!