A secret poker game you can play on the subway

Traditionally, in poker variants with wild cards that enable 5 of a kind hands, it does IIRC beat a royal flush. )"Royal straight" isn't a thing; AKQJT straights are sometimes called "broadway", but they're never distinguished as a separate hand type. Whereas royal flushes do get distinguished from straight flushes, but not for any good reason.)

But all of this is moot because TFA doesn't define "suits" for the "cards" anyway. And of course the relative probabilities do change when you only have 5 ranks. (And we're also effectively "drawing" without replacement; there are an effectively unlimited number of each rank available.)