Why I hate the index finger (1980)

Whoever wrote this was creating satire and I don’t even know if they realize it.

People still surprise me, but given this part, it's hard for me to imagine that the author was not being satirical on purpose:

> Obviously, I do not like arrogant disabled index digits and believe they should be removed if they cannot be restored to a functional status. There is no in-between with index fingers.

> To me, index fingers portray a hideous personality reflecting conceit and pantywaist attitudes. In essence, they are smart-ass digits we can often do without. If I had to lose a finger and had my choice, I would choose first my nondominant hand index ray and next the other index. I find index digits easy to hate and sometimes hard to love.

Although, maybe the author's point was serious?

If you read through carefully, the author is making a serious point: that in many cases of injury to the index finger, it is better functionally and cosmetically to remove it. He cites examples of patients with chronic pain or burning in the stump, and patients who have the remaining portion of the finger permanently extended, facilitating re-injury.

I'm no fingerologist but I do appreciate anyone who can make serious points in such a funny way.

I definitely noticed that, but if the goal was to convey a serious point, then would that be best served by humorous delivery?

That's the confusion I was trying to express by saying: "Although, maybe the author's point was serious?"