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254 points Michelangelo11 | 2 comments | | HN request time: 0s | source
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skinkestek ◴[] No.42057955[source]
> “You’re better looking than the guy I talked to before.” Such harassment remains common for tradeswomen

If people think this is harassment, no wonder people experience a lot of harassment.

Unless there was more to it the correct answer is along the lines of "yes thankfully" and then a laugh.

I'd recommend a good look in the mirror when looking for the problem in such situations.

Same goes for the thing about trying to discreetly notifying that someone has dirty hands:

Yes, I don't know what is up with Americans and demanding everyone has clean hands at all times, but as long as that is a thing this probably is meant as a favor. Maybe clumsily, but still.

More generally the saying: "when you hear hooves, think horses, not zebras" comes to mind:

If you expect things to be meant funny or helpful (and give people some slack) maybe life becomes a lot less stressful than if everything has to be seen through a lens of gender dynamics.

And if one is known as a reasonable person, I guess people will also take your side if you have to be loud and clear about something, e.g. if it turns out someone wasn't just clumsily trying to be nice or funny.

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blitzar ◴[] No.42058035[source]
I still get flashes of the traumatic day when I was in the kitchen area at work making myself a cup of tea and one of the female employees came in and said "You are a strong and tall man, can you get that heavy box from the top shelf for me".
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kazinator ◴[] No.42058040[source]
I had that happen numerous times in supermarkets.
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blitzar ◴[] No.42058126[source]
The supermarket encounters are most often dirty old women who are still stuck in the past, or have gotten away with it for so long they just don't know any better.
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1. nashashmi ◴[] No.42066568{3}[source]
> dirty old women who are still stuck in the past

This counts as an inflammatory statement. Even thinking this is beneath a person of fairness. Those are people too. And you may not like the era they were in and you may want to redefine the era of today to some lala make-believe, but at no point should you disrespect and denigrate the people who don't buy in to your redefinition.

It is like saying: Windows developers are stupid and stuck in the past because they cannot get in line with programming on a mac. come on! they don't have to. And they don't want to.

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2. blitzar ◴[] No.42068950[source]
It is like saying: dirty old man or even perverted old man. Which has probably been uttered 100s of thousands, maybe millions of times on this planet today in reference to men (those filthy perverts) interacting with others.