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You have a sad feeling for a moment, then it passes

(everything2.com)
385 points colinprince | 1 comments | 27 Jul 22 16:03 UTC | HN request time: 0s | source
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marcinreal ◴[27 Jul 22 17:17 UTC] No.32253301[source]▶
> My own death, of course, which I learnt will come when I least expect it, when everything is going right for once - that when no threats are apparent and I feel I can relax a little, it will be then that I choke over a tin of spinach, or mistake a blue e for a blue o, or a pink h for a pink h.

Just recently my wife developed a sudden and very aggressive infection. She's healthy and it totally came out of left field. Then it spread to me. It was definitely humbling. I don't believe in living in fear, but it's funny how everything can change in an instant.

I have to commend the title though:

> You have a sad feeling for a moment, then it passes

Coming to understand the ephemeral nature of emotions is what finally allowed me deal with them. They're still real, but they always pass, no matter how strong they seem in the moment.

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Cyberdog ◴[27 Jul 22 18:30 UTC] No.32254515[source]▶
I personally am still waiting on the "it passes" part.
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1. Gene_Parmesan ◴[27 Jul 22 21:49 UTC] No.32257479[source]▶
Grief is an enormously complicated emotional state that cannot be pithily summed up like that sentence. It's just a quote from a game.

In my experience, it doesn't pass, as in disappear. Instead, the fact of the loss slowly becomes a new fact of your reality. The newness of it will pass. The rawness of the pain will fade - most of the time. There will always be things that bring the person right back sitting next to you. But you begin to re-make your life.

If you continue to struggle and haven't already done so, I can recommend talking with a counselor (I hate the word therapist). Sometimes we just need to unload, but don't want to unload on/burden the other people in our life. Grief can be isolating in this way.